Text Messages
by JiminyBillyBob
Summary: Byakuya knew he shouldn't have read Rukia's text messages in the first place. IchiRuki.


**Disclaimer:** _Tite Kubo owns Bleach and I am just messing with his characters haha!_

**A/N:** _Stupid idea came to my mind so..._ _Hope you like it! :D_

* * *

**Texts Messages  
**

Byakuya noticed Rukia had been acting strange lately. She visited the World of Living more often, she smiled whenever her phone beeped, and she was on the phone with someone every single night (and that could last for hours), not that Byakuya overheard or anything. She was... happier in some way. Byakuya was curious. Not that he wanted to mind his sister's business, but he had the right to be curious.

So, when the said taichou found her phone lying on the table unguarded ...

Curiosity killed the cat, right?

* * *

From: Nii-sama

_Rukia, come home._

* * *

From: Ichigo

_When are you going to be back? The room seems lonely._

* * *

From: Ichigo

_Funny. Seriously, when?_

* * *

From: Ichigo

_Yuzu, Karin, the gang and old man miss you. I don't._

* * *

From: Ichigo

_Rukia, why don't you pick up your phone?_

* * *

From: Ichigo

_I will call you after dinner then. Ten?_

* * *

From: Ichigo

_I overslept. Sorry?_

* * *

From: Ichigo

_Can I call you now?_

* * *

From: Ichigo

_God, why are you not allowed to answer calls when your brother is around? And he is always around FFS._

* * *

From: Renji

_Rukia, your brother said the funniest remark about Ichigo this morning._

* * *

From: Renji

_Geez, I know my job is to make taichou like Ichigo. Mission impossible you know. You sure don't want to hear this one? Ok then..._

* * *

From: Ichigo

_Your stupid friend Renji just told your jerk brother that I said your jerk brother is the brother I never had._

_The hell?!_

* * *

From: Renji

_Hahaha Ichigo told you?_

_I know, Rukia! Hilarious, right? Ichigo doesn't think so. Your brother seemed disgusted when I told him that. He wanted to vomit.  
_

* * *

From: Ichigo

_Oi, come home. Your awesome boyfriend wants to see you._

* * *

From: Nii-sama

_Rukia, you have three days in the living world. Be safe. (I am not only talking about hollows, but also Kurosaki Ichigo)._

_K. Byakuya._

* * *

From: Nii-sama

_Rukia, you have one day left. Chef Ouzai will cook carbonara on Friday, your favorite._

_K. Byakuya._

* * *

From: Renji

_I tried. Taichou won't give you an extra day in the living world. Spending too much time with Kurosaki Ichigo will get her influenced, so he said._

_Eh. Can I go there? Want to kick Ichigo's ass. I've got so much pain helping him to impress Kuchiki-taichou. Today, he nearly slashed my mouth with Senbonzakura to shut me up._

* * *

From: Ichigo

_Screw Chef Ozi or Ozu. I can cook you carbonara._

* * *

From: Nii-sama

_Kurosaki Ichigo can't cook you carbonara._

_K. Byakuya._

* * *

From: Ichigo

_My hospital shift ends at 6. Wait until I come back home. Don't leave yet._

* * *

From: Ichigo

_Please, don't leave yet._

_Happy?_

* * *

From: Ichigo

_I love you, baka. Take care._

* * *

From: Ichigo

_I can be sweet._

_Rukia, I love you with cherries on top._

* * *

From: Renji

_Good news. I told your brother that everyone in Soul Society, except him, thinks Ichigo is a gentleman._

_He didn't reply but at least he didn't kidou me._

* * *

From: Renji

_I will kill your goddamn Ichigo. For the love of God, I swear..._

* * *

From: Renji

_He asked me to read these lines!_

_"Kurosaki Ichigo is a strong shinigami who achieved bankai in three days. Sorry what? Three days. Three days and he is not a noble. Three days."_

_"Kurosaki Ichigo defeated 3rd Seat of the 11th Division in the Gotei 13. He also defeated the lieutenant of the 6th Division in the Gotei 13 (Damn this kid!), Kurosaki Ichigo then fired a unnamed Getsuga Tensho at Renji breaking the lieutenants Zanpakuto and critically injuring him, much to his surprise. Then the said fukutaichou cried." (Again, fuck off Ichigo.)_

_Kurosaki Ichigo also defeated the blood-thirsty the current captain of the 11th Division in the Gotei 13. Let's not forget it. He also defeated someone particular. Not just any taichou, but Kuchiki Byakuya-taichou. Intense match. The better won anyway. He cares for his friends. And he is a good brother. He is too good that the mighty Kuchiki Byakuya learned how to be a perfect brother from him." I didn't even have to get to finish reading that goddamn paper. I was nearly cut in half!_

_If I didn't dodge, I would be DEAD._

* * *

From: Ichigo

_I wish I could see Byakuya's face when Renji read those lines. Priceless._

_I came up with the idea. Chad wrote the lines. He has good handwriting.  
_

* * *

From: Nii-sama

_Rukia, there's a captain meeting tonight. Don't wait for me. You can eat dinner by yourself._

_K. Byakuya._

* * *

From: Renji

_"Taichou, Ichigo is a very kind human being. He helps the elderly cross the street."_

_Ichigo's idea. Haha._

_Taichou only raised his eyebrow. Good sign._

* * *

From: Ichigo

_It's been three weeks. There's something important I want to ask you._

* * *

From: Ichigo

_I won't do it on the phone, Rukia. Why don't you come home? It is lonely here, only me and the kitten._

* * *

From: Ichigo

_The kitten's doing great. She doesn't like you that much. Me? Not so much._

* * *

From: Ichigo

_Can I go to Soul Society?_

* * *

From: Ichigo

_-Forwarded message-_

_To: Byakuya_

_From: Me_

_Yo, Byakuya, it's Ichigo (just in case you lost my number). Sorry to bother you but I want to visit Soul Society. Can I stay at your place? You can lock my room so I can't sneak to Rukia's just like last time if you want.-_

_Am I good or what?_

* * *

From: Ichigo

_-Forwarded message-_

_To: Me_

_From: Byakuya_

_Kurosaki Ichigo, you can go sleep under the bridge. I do not care._

_And I didn't lose your number. I blocked you._

_K. Byakuya._

* * *

From: Ichigo

_He is hopeless._

* * *

From: Ukitake-taichou

_Dear Kuchiki, Sentaoro, Kiyone, thank you so much for the birthday surprise. I am beyond happy. Have dinner with me tomorrow night.  
_

_Ukitake._

* * *

From: Ichigo

_Rukia, I hate Renji. He told Byakuya he was my role model.  
_

_MY role model.  
_

_I am going nuts._

* * *

_From: Renji_

_I was on the phone with Ichigo. Guess what! He is going to... Ah damnit I can't tell you!_

* * *

From: Renji

_How is my job doing? It is static._

_Every day I bring up Ichigo in my conversation with Taichou. I compliment him every single day. I am afraid Taichou will get the wrong idea..._

* * *

From: Renji

_I once said any girl would be lucky to have Ichigo. (I ran out of ideas! Rangiku-san once said this so that was the only thing left that I had in mind!)_

_I swore he looked at me like I was the most disgusting being in the society._

_How bad is that, Rukia?_

* * *

From: Renji

I_ never had anyone questioning my masculinity before._

* * *

From: Ichigo

_Renji freakin' told Byakuya I am eager to call him Nii-sama._

_Can I kill him now?_

* * *

From: Nii-sama

_Rukia, tell Kurosaki Ichigo to call me. I need to tell him your curfew._

_K. Byakuya.  
_

* * *

From: Renji

_Rukiaaa, call me I need details. Did the bastard kneel down on one knee? Did the bastard say cheesy lines?_

_Congratulations, my friend!_

* * *

From: Renji

-_Forwarded message-_

_To: Ichigo_

_From: Me_

_Oi, Ichigo! Answer my phone. Congratulations, dumbass. If you hurt Rukia, I will kill you. -_

_Rukia, if you hurt him, I will buy you chappy._

_P/S: Now that you two are engaged and Kuchiki-Taichou still wants to kill Ichigo, this means double work for me. Am I not a good friend?_

* * *

From: Inoue

_I hear wedding bells!_

_Oh my God, Kuchiki-san! Congratulations! (Sado-kun told me this!) I am so happy for you two! :-)_

_As soon as I put my daughter to bed, I will call you okay!_

* * *

From: Nii-sama

_Rukia, your favorite servant, Magda, resigns._

_P/S: Chef Ouzai will cook rice dumplings on Thursday. Your favorite. Be home by then._

_K. Byakuya._

* * *

From: Ishida

_Congratulations, Kuchiki-san. I am so happy for you two._

_P/S: I chose the ring. Kurosaki knows nothing about women. And I also can help you with the wedding dress. How did the proposal go? He spent an entire day practicing. I spent almost an entire day listening to him propose to Sado-kun. Sado-kun spent an entire day helping Kurosaki practice. Worth it?  
_

* * *

From: Isshin_  
_

_HELLO, MY (soon-to-be OFFICIAL) DAUGHTER (in-law)!  
_

* * *

Byakuya couldn't believe what he read.

Kurosaki Ichigo proposed to Rukia.

Kurosaki Ichigo, the damn ryoka, proposed to Rukia, his dear sister.

Byakuya froze. He never thought he could be this angry.

Damn Kurosaki Ichigo.

He grabbed his phone and sent someone a text._  
_

* * *

Ichigo's phone beeped.

One unread message.

From: Byakuya

_You. Me. Soukyoku Hill. Now, you bastard._

_K. Byakuya._

* * *

**A/N:**_ Thoughts? Review please and constructive criticisms are welcomed! Cheers :D (Note: I REFUSE to believe Byakuya is dead. NO WAY.)_


End file.
